Agora: Epic Mediocrity

I preface this post with a SPOILER ALERT in case the film ever makes it to a theater near you.

I recently gained access to screen the unreleased film AGORA, an English-language historical drama from lauded Spanish director Alejandro Amenabar.  The producers are currently shopping the film for North American distribution after its tepid reception at Cannes in May.  Even spectacular production value, beautiful costumes and visceral violence couldn’t carry its general bulk.

The story picks up in AD 369 Alexandria, as we learn from the first of several lengthy title cards, and attempts to give an historical account of the bloody rise of Christianity in the city.  The film slightly overshoots the the mark of requisite carnage for its genre, chronicling the slaughter of Christians by the pagans (mostly swords), then the pagans by the Christians (mostly pitchforks), then the Christians by the Jews (mostly stones), then the Jews by the Christians (a cocktail of torture, rape and burning)… but the main characters remain unscathed to finish the story.

Our focus (for some reason) is on the voice-of-reason historical figure of Hypatia of Alexandria (played satisfactorily by Rachel Weisz).  She is a beloved teacher, restless philosopher, mathematician, astronomer and wise atheist.  She is also the center of a love triangle that is completed by city’s political head, Orestes Jr., and her former slave, Davus.  Unfortunately her scientific breakthroughs don’t quite carry the impact we hope for (planetary orbits are not perfect circles), and the love triangle is uninvolving (which is just as well in the end).  The atheist Hypatia must ultimately die for her faith, a very ironic heroine.

I predict that Agora will have a short domestic run in “select theaters” before lying to rest with its banished brethren, Alexander and Kingdom of Heaven.  Watch the trailer.